Monday, June 13, 2011


Jonathan Frakes, 1996
Starring: Patrick Stewart, Jonathan Frakes, Brent Spiner, LeVar Burton, Michael Dorn, Gates McFadden, Marina Sirtis, Alice Krige

I'm not sure how or why this happened, but I'm rapidly becoming this person who can't handle
Star Trek: The Next Generation. I grew up watching it and still love the original series obsessively. Since when did my tolerance for Next Generation go out the window? I recently tried to rekindle the flame with First Contact, but to little avail.

The newly commissioned Enterprise has been ordered to ignore a battle between a Federation ship and a Borg Cube. When Capt. Jean Luc Picard realizes that the Federation is losing, he and his crew throw caution and their orders to the wind and pursue the Cube, destroying it. A small part of the ship escapes and heads towards Earth. When the Federation attempts to stop them, they get sucked into a time warp and have to defeat the Borg back in the 21st century with the reluctant help of a drunk scientist. Meanwhile, the Borg "Queen" has kidnapped Data and tries to assimilate him.

Though I have a nostalgic love for the show, I don't really like any of the Next Generation movies. Nemesis, yes, because it has Remans and Tom Hardy. The others... meh. And First Contact is surely one of the most irritating. I love the Borg. Love, love, love the Borg. Their "Queen," played by Alice Krige, is a total babe. She can assimilate me any time she wants.

It's a shame the plot of this film is rather stupid and the attempts at comedy are soul crushingly dull. I love Picard and he's the sole reason I suffer through Next Generation films time and time again, but the rest of the cast is increasingly frustrating. Come on, Data. Use your robot powers and smash Deanna Troi's head into Beverly Crusher's as hard as possible. Then this can become the big gay space adventure we all really want it to be.

This is the first feature film in the Next Generation series and pretty much sets the course for the rest of them. If you hate it, you're going to hate the others more. If you love it and think I'm a moron, so be it. But I can't really recommend it, particularly not in comparison with the first couple of original Star Trek films. Buy it here if you are so inclined, otherwise, take my advice and rock this set instead.

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